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Wednesday, May 6, 2015

Nurses Day

I am a nurse.

I am not your mother. No, I will not clean up your room or wipe your nose. I'm also not your lawyer. Nor do I work for the State Vital Records Office. I'm not sure which baby daddy you should put on your birth certificate. And NO! For the 100th time, I don't want to hear how they both came into your life, so conveniently, at the same time..... On the same night.

I'm also not your drug dealer. I will never believe your pain is a 15 out of 10 when you're laughing in the room with your family and posting your makeup-less selfie on Facebook for, so called, breast cancer awareness. 

That actually leads me to my next point. I'm not an idiot. I do not, for one second, believe you are going out to get "fresh air". Only two things on God's green Earth will keep a new mom from her newborn. Drugs and cigarettes. If you try to walk off my unit with an IV in your arm, I will body slam you. Check yourself, I don't play. And I always know what you've really done. Seriously, it's in your chart. You can thank "Dr. Magic" for that.

But you know what I am?

I am your cheerleader. I will cheer you on and stand behind any and every decision you make. It's your health and your entitled to a choice. 

I'm also your advocate. When I feel like a doctor is making a wrong call, I don't mind calling him or her out. But unfortunately, I'm a postpartum nurse so I'm also your baby's advocate. Even if that means advocating against you. Those are called margarita nights.

I'm your shoulder to cry on and boy have I dealt with the tears. Remember, I work on a postpartum unit. The mom's I work with are just delirious hormones with access to Percocet.

But first, and most importantly, I'm a mom. I have a family outside the four walls of your room. I don't live and breathe to take care of you and your ouchie when there's a little person at home that needs my attention and care even more. 

Do me a favor and thank your nurse. She's tired, hungry, has had to pee for the last 2 hours and is missing her kid's first big school play but she's voluntarily putting your needs ahead of her own. And she claims to love it.

So at the end of all of this, do you still need a giggle?

Here it goes.

Today is National Nurse's Day. A coworker's husband sent her flowers for the occasion and on the card it said "Happy Nashville Nurse's Day". 

Way to go.... Nashville nurses.....

-WB, R.N.


2 comments:

  1. I got you Little Ceasar's Crazy Bread and a margarita. Way better than flowers.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thank you for being such a great Nurse!! Your patients are so lucky to have you!

    ReplyDelete